What Has Happened To Simple Respect??

As I’ve said here before, I’m a mom of six - ranging in age from 13 to almost 23. I’m far from perfect and even further from knowing it all about raising kids. However, I do have some pretty firm ideas on teaching children simple respect.

I work online full-time, so, to get my expanding butt out of the house I work at a local small bar/restaurant a couple days a week. In the course of this “time out for mom job”, I come in contact with a wide variety of folks - many of them parents.

I cannot tell you how many times I’ve muttered under my breath as I’ve watched parents laugh at their children when the kids start throwing French fries at each other across the table. And, these kids aren’t toddlers, they are pre-teens and sometimes teenagers.

Or, how about when the kids decide to make a salt sculpture on the seat? Or, one of my personal favorites, use a whole bottle of catsup and half a bottle of mustard to make designs on seats, tables or plates.

What are these parents thinking???

My 16-year-old daughter waitressed part time at the same restaurant over the summer and she came home in near-shock more than once. One afternoon, after I had helped her clean up a particularly nasty ‘kid-mess’, she looked at me and said, “Mom, if we’d have done this, you’d never have taken us anywhere again.”

Ya know, she’s right. I have far from perfect children (thank heaven, because that would be quite boring!), however, my children, no matter how mouthy or cranky or messy they may get at home, have terrific manners in public and at others’ homes. They treat people with respect and they care about how they are perceived when they are out and about. I get constant compliments on their behavior at restaurants.

The bottom line to me, is simply that if a child is not taught to respect others’ property and persons when simply going out for a meal, how on earth can we expect them to have learned respect in other, more complicated areas of life?

Parents shake their heads when they read or hear about a child who has broken a law and gotten into trouble - but that crap started early - it’s called NO RESPECT.

Kids will be kids - and they will act out and do things that would make a preacher think about cussing. However, if WE, as parents, cannot take the time to teach them something as simple as good manners, then (in my opinion anyway) we have no right to bitch when they fail at the myriad of other social skills required of them as they grow older.

Are parents lazy nowadays? Too busy? Don’t give a rat’s a**? I have no idea. But, it’s sad (and scary). If we can’t (or don’t want to) control a 13-year-old who wants to have a French Fry fight at the local restaurant, we sure as he** ain’t gonna control him when he decides to sneak out and drink with his buddies.

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